I wouldn't be surprised if I have totally lost my readers. Even though my readers are mostly my family, and they kinda just read my blog cause they love me. And they want to see cute pictures of my kids. So, sorry that I haven't blogged before this. I promise to do better.
So, some random thoughts.
I really miss singing in the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, still. It's been more than a year now, but it still surprises me how pained I feel when I remember. Of course, there is so much joy in the memory, too. I really wonder if I'll ever get to have musical experiences like that again. Hopefully I'll get to sing in Heavenly Choirs in the next life, huh? I have been teaching a lot of singing and piano lessons lately, though, and it does feel so satisfying to feel that I'm passing on that knowledge and joy to others. There are few things that give me greater pleasure than watching a student figure out a technique that opens and changes their voice in a beautiful and dramatic way. I love watching their faces, and see the surprise and joy at finding a new voice, refining that very personal part of themselves. I don't think that I'll ever get tired of that.
Do you ever think about the person you were as a teenager or young adult, and sometimes feel like you've lost important parts of who you were? Most of the important things, I think I've retained. But sometimes, I wonder if I've lost some elusive part of me - my zest for life, my intensity and drive. Maybe I'm just tired, because I'm the mother of four young children, and I haven't slept through the night in over a year, and I'm feeling a little melancholy tonight. But, part of me keeps hoping that I'll find it again.
And, onto yet another subject - Ben was called into the bishopric on Sunday - first counselor. The appointment with the Stake President was at 10 a.m., and by 11:15, he'd been sustained and was sitting on the stand. And I was sitting alone with our four children. Needless to say, it was all just a bit overwhelming. Can I just say, that I feel too young to be married to a member of the bishopric? I don't feel nearly wise enough, or together enough in my life to be here. I also want to say, though, that I still can't believe that I'm married to such an incredibly wonderful man. He grows on me everyday, and I liked him a lot to begin with. He really is my better half. I'm so thankful to be married to someone who loves the Lord so much, and is willing to give up his very small amount of free time to serve and to build the Kingdom of God. Not to mention, he's really, really good looking, and a great kisser. Oh, sorry...
And to round off this totally random post, I'm going to add some totally random pictures.